Two Days....

On December 30, 2011 when I registered for the Fargo Marathon, I really didn't put much thought in to what it would feel like to be two days away from actually running a marathon. 

I started training on January 15th.  So, you can see why it didn't really seem real until very recently.  That was roughly 18 weeks of training for one day - one day that is quickly turning in to one of the biggest days of my life.   Now, I have two beautiful little girls and nothing will ever trump the two days when they came in to the world.  But, with the anticipation and the work that has been put in to this marathon - it's pretty high on the list.

I had thought about writing this whole series of posts leading up to the marathon.  What I was going to wear (UA compression shorts, Team Sparkle running skirt, black tank/shirt, sparkle headband), what I planned on eating this week (pretty much anything I can get my hands on, I kid, sort of), how much water I was going to drink (a ton, and then a ton more), my last visit with my PT Pete (I will indeed write about this because he is amazing!) and oh so much more.  But, here's the deal - I feel like most of that is good information but it doesn't really convey how I am feeling about this whole thing. 

I am not sure how to convey how I am feeling about this whole thing to be honest. 

I am scared.  This is a huge deal, I have not done anything this huge.  Or at least it doesn't feel like I have.  Yes, I have birthed two very healthy babies - but my body was built to do that.  Some may argue that our bodies were made to run also, but I don't think it's quite the same thing! Just my opinion.

I am excited.  I can hear the cheering, I can see the signs, I can hear the music.  I can't wait.

I am losing my mind.  Yes, this is the absolute, freaking truth.  I had envisioned writing this post about how awesome I feel, how I am going to kick this marathon's ass.  Yeah, right.  Maybe if I run a second one I will have all of those bad ass feelings.  But, today - I am simply consumed. 

I am doubting my training.  I followed a great plan - Hal Higdon is a genius and I don't doubt the plan he wrote.  I doubt how well I executed it.  Did I run every prescribed run - nope.  Did I run every prescribed run in the manner it was supposed to be run - nope.  I made modifications - I listened to my body when necessary.  But, two days away, I question if I put enough miles in.  Somewhere in my brain, I know that I did.  And according to my PT, my body is physically ready for this challenge.  I just need to listen. 

I am proud.  I am going to be able to say that I ran a marathon.  That's kind of a big deal, right?  I think so.  If you had asked me last January when I started running, if I wanted to ever run a marathon, I would have laughed at you and I would have laughed loud and hard.  I just wanted to be able to run a 5K without walking.  Proud.

I have run roughly 400 miles in the last four months.  That is a drop in the bucket for a lot of runners.  For me, that is a lot of miles.  There were weeks during my training that I ran 30-35 miles.  For me, that is a lot of miles.  There was this one day when I ran 20 miles.  For me, that is a lot of miles.  On Saturday I am going to run 26.2 miles.  For me, that is a lot of miles. 

My mission is to run the majority of those 26.2 miles with a smile on my face and with pride in my heart.

There are some people in my life who have been very pivotal in making sure I made it to this point. 

• My husband, who every Saturday for the last 18 weeks took care of our kids while I hit the trails, sometimes for hours. 
• And my kids, who can't be in Fargo, but who have been my best cheerleaders, I love you both so much!
• My best friend Melissa, who faithfully took those to trails with me and who is going to be running her first half marathon in Fargo, I could not be more proud of you! 
• My mom, dad, step mom, and in laws - who all took turns watching the girls for me during the week so I could get a run in -whether it was at the lake, at the gym or at the local high school - you all made it possible for me to log the miles and for that I am forever grateful.  
• My running friends - the one who encouraged to me to start in the first place and the ones who kept me going.  The running community is a neat place and I am so honored to be a part of it.
• To my friends and family who have checked in with me, come to other races to cheer me on or race with me, and have loved me and believed in me even though I may not have been the most attentive these past few months.  You are my rocks and I thank you all so much!
• Every person who has logged on to this blog, followed me on Twitter and Facebook, and left your words of encouragement, you have all continued to inspire me with your own badassery - thank you, thank you, thank you. I will think of all of you during the race on Saturday.
• And, to all of my friends I have met through blogging who tirelessly encourage and support me.  There are sometimes people who scoff when you say you have met a friend online - I think they are missing out.  Some of you I haven't even had the privilege of meeting in person yet, but you support me no matter what.  I am eternally grateful to all of you!

I love you all so much and I run this for me, but I will be thinking of all of you as I check off each mile.  You will never know the impact you have all made to my life!

This last 18 weeks has taught me so much about myself.  I am a runner.  I am strong.  I am capable of doing hard things.  I have the ability to push myself farther than I knew possible.  And most importantly, I am loved. 

The next time you read this blog it will be authored by a marathoner. 

(I just re-read that last line)

Yep, I guess that is pretty badass after all!

A Great Stepback Week!

24 days - but who's counting, right?  Yeah, right! 

This last week I was in Las Vegas all week for work.  The work was great - very productive, lots of great things on the horizon.  The workouts, not as great.  I ran.  Once.  On a treadmill.  I dislike treadmills.  Especially when I have been able to do the majority of my training runs outdoors lately.  Treadmills suck, but they are necessary at times.  Needless to say, with my work schedule and being exhausted, I only made it to the gym one time for a pretty decent 5 miler. 

I had a very large travel debacle.  Our flight was cancelled and I spent the better part of 40 hours awake, trying to get home on Friday morning.  I made it, safe and sound, thank goodness I had my mom along for a travel companion or I may have lost it even more so. 

Saturday I had planned to run 12 miles (step back week on the training schedule).  I was tired, too tired.  I made the grown up decision to push my long run to Sunday morning.  I ended up going out for my 12 miler solo.  I love running partners, but I secretly like to spend time solo on runs every now and again.  It gives me an opportunity to really focus on what I am doing and what I am trying to accomplish.  I have kind of fallen in love with the Midtown Greenway, Cedar Lake Trail, Minnesota River trail that can get me all the way from South Mpls to Hopkins/Mtka area past 494.  It's a great trail, lots of other peeps out there enjoying the trail so you never feel alone.  And at one point in Hopkins (I think) the trail turns to dirt for awhile and I LOVE IT!  Maybe trail running will be in my future at some point.  It feels good to switch from pavement to dirt for a bit. 

I am so glad I waited until Sunday to run - I thought it was going to be bad since I ran so little during the week.  But, I think my legs were actually pretty happy about the extra rest.  I felt great from mile one.  My breathing was on point, my legs felt strong (tight, but strong) and my head was in the right spot.  I decided before I started that I was going to run this as close to my marathon pace as possible.  I ended up running it even a little bit faster than I plan on running the marathon.  I got to mile 9 and felt so good I actually contemplated tacking on a few more miles, but instead I decided to push the last three miles.  I ended up running the last 6 miles of this run at negative splits.  It felt amazing.  I wore my Camelbak again and it was perfect, enough water, holds my Gu, keys and phone - best purchase I have made lately!

Take a look at these splits - I was having fun! (Tried for so long to copy the details from Garmin Connect - could NOT figure it out!)

Split   Time    Distance
1        9:49.3  1.00
2        9:55.9  1.00
3       10:23.9 1.00
4       10:34.7 1.00
5       10:12.5 1.00
6       10:47.2 1.00
7       10:32.7 1.00
8       10:05.5 1.00
9        9:56.9 1.00
10      9:51.8 1.00
11      9:48.5 1.00
12      9:21.0 1.00
Summary Time 2:01:26 Miles 12.01 Avg Pace 10:07



This run really made me feel confident in my ability to push myself and keep a decent pace (for me!) for 12 miles.  I can only hope that it translates well to my 20 mile run this coming Sunday and then ultimately the full marathon at Fargo. 

I am pretty sure this smile says it all!

Be happy and healthy my friends!
Jen

4 Weeks!

One month/4 weeks/28 days/672 hours....however you break it down, that is officially the time remaining until I run my very first full marathon!  I am here to tell you that I am officially nervous, like stomachache inducing nervous.  My training has been solid - I have had a couple of rough patches with some nagging body pains but nothing I haven't been able to work through.  This last week was not real good - I was in Las Vegas for work - I only had time to run once so I am behind on my weekday mileage.  My long run this weekend is 12 miles (step back week after the 19 miler last weekend) - I normally do my long runs on Saturday mornings.  My return trip from Las Vegas was a debacle and I ended up being awake for almost 42 hours straight - I had no interest in getting up at 6:30 on Saturday AM to run so I have pushed it until tomorrow.  Which is totally fine and ensures that I get two nights of decent sleep under my belt before running a longer distance.  The biggest reason I didn't make more time to run during the week - all I could do is run on the treadmill.  Tuesday afternoon after working I headed to the gym, jumped on the tready and recalled how much I HATE it - I logged 5 miles and promptly got off that darn thing.  I just could not drum up enough motivation to hit it up again two more days.  When you get off the tready for a bit and then have to use it, it's even worse.  I just don't have a good relationship with the tready - I swear I am always more sore and in pain the days after a treadmill run - in my head?  Possibly, but I still don't like it. 

So, my head is spinning.  Examining the remainder of my training calendar and figuring out what I need to do to get to the start line in 4 weeks ready and healthy to run that 26.2 miles.  This coming weekend I am running the Get in Gear 10K with Melissa on Saturday morning.  Then, on Sunday I will be logging my 20 miler - the longest training run I will have before the marathon.  I have started to wonder if I am going to regret using a training program that doesn't believe in running the actual distance prior to the race.  But, I can't go back now and change that.  Honestly, I think once you have run 20 miles, the remaining 6 will come, I reckon it's the .2 that is going to kill me! 

I am excited, nervous, scared, unsure, and super psyched to run this marathon.  I am not sure how healthy it is to have such a mixed bag of emotions but I suspect it's pretty normal for runners attempting their biggest goal.  A little over a year ago when I started running, if you had told me I was going to be running a marathon on May 19, 2012 - I would have laughed in your face, and not even politely - I would have belly laughed all over you!  I continue to be amazed at my progress through training and the way my body has really come through for me. 

I do not have an official time goal for the Fargo Marathon, I just want to finish upright, maybe even with a smile on my face.  I would be lying if I said I didn't have any sort of finish time in my mind - but it's not a thing that will devastate me if I don't get it.  I really do just want to run this race, have a great time and know that I did everything in my power to properly prepare myself for the challenge.  And, I would be kidding myself if I didn't say that I am already contemplating whether or not I will run the Twin Cities Marathon.  I have told myself that if I make it through Fargo and there are still spots in the TC Marathon - I will do it.  Oh goodness, did I just say that out loud!?!?!? 

I will check back in later this week.  There are so many things I want to write about - it's just about making/taking the time to do so. 

Be happy and healthy friends!

Jen